Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End | B

director: Gore Verbinski
starring: Johnny Depp, Keira Knightley, Orlando Bloom, Geoffrey Rush, Bill Nighy, Chow Yun-Fat, Stellan SkARRRRRsgård

The third chapter in the swashbuckling extravaganza that is the Pirates of the Caribbean has hit theaters, and while it’s an amazing achievement in the realm of visual arts, it leaves a lot to be desired in the story and resonance departments. Weighing at a whopping 168 minutes, At World’s End is a bloated, effects-laden monstrosity; emblematic of the upper echelons of the Hollywood blockbuster.

I’ll spare you the details of the story, and since there really isn’t one, that won’t be too difficult. Every line of dialogue in the film could’ve been replaced with, “ARRRR!!!” or “AVAST, ME HEARTIES!!!” and it wouldn’t have made any difference in the audience’s understanding of what’s going on. Seriously, there’s no complicated plot details to get caught up in. It’s a convoluted skeleton of a story that serves only to get you to the next jaw-dropping special effects sequence. And therein lies the reason to see the movie. The effects are unbelievably good, and likely the best to ever come out of Hollywood thus far (all apologies to George “What Plot?” Lucas and his Star Wars prequels).

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Still Lost

Some more speculation from the fallout of Lost’s third season finale:

  • Unless it’s an alias, it looks like the coffin contains neither Ben nor Locke. Some eagle-eyed HDTV owners have come up with this approximation of the obituary:

    “The body of Jeremy Bentham of New York was found shortly after 4 am in the 4300 block of Grand Avenue.

    Ted Worden, a doorman at the Tower Lofts complex, heard loud noises coming from the victim’s loft.

    Concerned for tenants’ safety, he entered the loft and found the body hanging from a beam in the living room.

    According to Jaime Ortiz, a police spokesman, the incident was deemed a suicide after medical tests. Bentham is survived by one teenaged son.

    Memorial services will be held at the Hoffs-Drawlar Funeral Home tomorrow evening.”

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So much for fate…is it 2008 yet?

That changes things a tad.

I had the whole “these aren’t flashbacks” thing figured out relatively early in the episode, but that didn’t lessen the impact of the final reveal of the season: (some of) our castaways made it off the island, and they aren’t too thrilled about it. Flipping the whole flashback convention (making the island the focus of said flashbacks) has been a long time coming, and this was probably the right time to do it. Next season will surely get off to a fast start (I hope), as we’ve got a lot to address, but I’m wondering if next season will follow the format of tonight’s finale, with “flash-forwards” instead of flashbacks. Anyway, more questions. Who rescued them? Did everyone make it off the island? Did anyone willingly stay? Did Desmond reunite with Penny? Did the remaining Others stay hidden? Why is a suicidal Jack so certain he made a mistake in leaving the island?

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The Fuse

Down at the courthouse they’re bringin’ the flag down
Long black line of cars snakin’ slow through town
Red sheets snappin’ on the line
With this ring will you be mine?
The fuse is burning
Shut out the lights
The fuse is burning
Come on let me do you right

Trees on fire with first fall’s frost
Long black line front of Holy Cross
Blood moon risin’ in a sky black dust
Tell me Baby who do you trust?
The fuse is burning
Shut out the lights
The fuse is burning
Come on let me do you right

Tires on the highway hissin’; something’s come
feel the wires and the tree tops hummin’
Devil’s on the horizon line
Your kiss and I’m alive

Quiet afternoon; an empty house
On the edge of bed you slip off your blouse
The room is burning with the noon sun
Your bittersweet taste on my tongue
{The fuse is burning
Shut out the lights
The fuse is burning
Come on let me do you right} (x2)

The fuse is burning… (x7)


Bruce Springsteen
The Rising
Release: 2002
Lyrics: Springsteen
Music: Springsteen

I will now crawl into a spider-hole and die.

The Buffalo Sabres went into Game 7 of the 2005-06 Eastern Conference finals down four starting defensemen and hanging onto the prospects of reaching the Cup Finals by the skin of their teeth. They entered the 3rd period up a goal despite seemingly insurmountable odds, before ultimately losing in a valiant effort against the Carolina Hurricanes. Since the moment the final horn sounded in that game, the team has had an intense, singular goal of reaching the Finals and finally claiming the championship that this city has desperately sought after for so very long. Wide Right, No Goal, Music City Miracle, No Goal II; the list goes on in the annals of Buffalo sports misery. This was the year Buffalo would shed the burdensome label of all-time “loser” and finally winning it all for the city that’s lived and died with its’ sports teams.

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Follow the yellow brick road…

Now we’re talkin’. There were a whole slew of things to mark off the “what does it all mean?” checklist tonight, which I’ll get to shortly; but of course, it wouldn’t be a Lost episode if we didn’t get a whole new slew of questions that need answering down the line.

As has become readily apparent over the course of the season, Ben has a tenuous hold over his band of Others, and at no time had that become more evident than in tonight’s episode. Ben could see control of the “tribe” being wrested away from him by Locke, right in front of his eyes. No one came to Mikhail’s aid when Locke beat him, no one questioned why Locke was able to force Ben to take him to see Jacob, and as we saw last week, they all see Locke as a messianic savior to lead them out of the tyranny of Benjamin Linus. Unfortunately, we also know Ben is a master tactician, always staying eight moves ahead of everyone else. Locke found this out the hard way, taking a bullet in the gut for his trouble.

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